Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Gabe scare

Bryan and I helped (Well Bryan did since I have Gabe) Nathan and Julie move this weekend. It reminded me of Memorial Day weekend 3 years ago when we moved into our house except it was a lot harder having 2 little boys under 7 months.
Monday we were all over at their apartment even Jacob came to help too while Janell was working. Bryan, Nathan and Jacob were taking a load over to my parents and Julie ended up taking her clothes over so that left Mom, me, Gabe, Dad and Jaden. Jaden was fast asleep in my moms arms and as there was no furniture to sit on I laid a blanket out and put Gabe down. He was making his funny noises, stretching, yawning etc. when he threw up. It was very thick and there was a lot! It had been a while since I'd fed him so it was weird that he was throwing it up. I think that he has acid reflex. They say that Preemies are prone to it? Anyway, I was looking all over for a burp rag to clean him up and my mom yelled he's choking. This has happened before so I calmly turned him on his side and started patting his back. Mom told me to get the syringe (they told me to use that if he chokes and use it to suck the spit up out of his mouth). It wasn't working and more was coming out. Out of his mouth and nose. His eye's got big and he started changing color and he wasn't breathing. Mom started crying and gave Jaden to my dad. Told me to call 911 and she was patting him on the back.
You know I went to the baby CPR class and sat there thinking I'll never have to use this on him. Never say never. In that CPR class they show you how to do the Heimlich on a baby too. Surprisingly I was calm through the whole thing. When I was talking to the 911 operator Gabe had started to cry and breathe, he told me NOT to do CPR (as I was just about to) because he couldn't cry if he wasn't breathing. The ambulance arrived and it was two ladies who were SO kind. I was glad that it was women and not men, I don't know why? Through all of that Gabe's color turned first to red then purple then blue and after he started breathing again he was a very pasty green. He didn't get his color back for a long time and he was so tired. I didn't cry until later after we had dinner that Nathan and Julie bought for all of us and I was holding him in my arms and looking at him. I'm going to cry now typing this because it was probably the most traumatic thing that has ever happened to me. I can't even begin to tell you how that felt. I thought, I'm going to lose my baby right now. As he was trying to breathe he would let out this noise like he was trying to breathe and cry and it just broke my heart. I felt so helpless. I can live without that ever happening again. Just goes to show that I can't control what happens to my precious boy, God is in control!

Friday, May 25, 2007

Life

Lets see where to begin? I hope I can remember everything...Bryan has had a ton of homework so I haven't gotten much time to log on.

Last Friday we pretty much stayed around the house for the day then we picked up a few things at the store and headed to our Sunday School class dinner at the B's. It was our first time getting to go to the Friday night dinners and it went pretty well. We got there and pretty much everyone was there. Deanna was BBQing and parents were getting their kids dinner. There are a ton of little girls in our group. Gabe has the pick of the litter although they're all older than him.
We ate dinner and went downstairs to meet. I had to leave and feed Gabe during that and then when I came back down he was getting fussy so Bryan and I left. I didn't get to hear pretty much any of the meeting, but such is my life now. Maybe at the next one he'll be better and he actually wasn't that bad I just didn't want to distract everyone and also push him.

Saturday we had Travis's surprise b-day party. Mom wasn't doing anything that night so she offered to watch Gabe while we went. We went over to my parents a little early so that Bryan could help my dad bring up their entertainment center from the family room to the living room. There is a lot of moving around and chaos with getting ready for Julie and Nathan to move in. We left for the party around 6:50 and went to Papa's Pizza. Travis was pretty surprised, but as they pulled up he saw cars of people he knew so he caught on. There was a pretty good turn out and it was fun to hang out and chat with everyone.

I talked to Randy for a while about work. When I return back to work I will be on his team and working for the Safeway pod. I won't be on the 12th floor anymore, but up on the 20th floor. This is going to be SO weird. I hope that I will like it. It's going to be hard enough going back to work let alone having a whole new position. He said that they have a ton of work and that they don't know what they're going to do for the whole summer...they need me now.

He also told me why I haven't heard back from Christina the HR gal in our office. Right after the last time I talked to her on the phone she had gone to a dr appointment and they found a tumor the size of a basketball in her uterus. They didn't even give her the chance to go for a 2nd opinion they operated 2 days later and now she is having to undergo chemo therapy. WOW!

I have talked to an HR gal in our Bellevue office and they are trying to get this all figured out. I have been out since March on bed rest and then having Gabe and recovering from that. I'm not exactly sure how it works, but I could be getting back paid for my time off. That would help us out so much!

We had had a pretty rough night with Gabe on Friday and Saturday evening too. I was so tired and we decided not to go to church and just stay home. Although Bryan got a phone call saying that the annex wasn't open and that the kids couldn't find any staff so he ended up getting ready quickly and going.
It ended up being ok though...Kimmie (one of the staff) and a few of the girls went to go find someone to open up the annex and they ended up stopping in the little coffee shop thing that our church put in the library. I haven't see it yet because I forgot to look at it when we went to church on Mother's day, but I heard it looks awesome!

I am not remembering a lot of things...my days keeping running into each other and when I don't journal for a while I forget. I don't remember what we did on Monday. I know that I stayed home because I knew that I was going to be taking Gabe with me to the shower and Bryan was going to class.
My shower was AWESOME! My sisters (Julie and Janell)/seesters (Teresa and Moo), plus my mom did a great job. I am so blessed to have them in my life. Mom, Julie and Janell decorated early that afternoon and Teresa and Moo set up the food. The decor was so cute. Gabe and I got there around 5:45 with Julie and Janell. My mom left to get there by 5:30 to open up the church. I had to feed Gabe and people started arriving. Gabe was a little fussy after I fed him and as we started the shower I gave him to my mom so that I could get some food and have her hold him while I opened up the gifts.

After everyone got food and settled down we played a couple games...nothing big because I hate games. My mom put an invitation under one of the chairs and gave that person a gift card and then we went around the room and everyone said how they knew me and Bryan and guessed how much I weighed when I was born. Everyone guessed low. I was 8lbs 8 ounces.
I started opening the gifts and BOY did we get a lot. I feel way more settled now and overwhelmed with the generosity of everyone.
I wanted to go home right then and organize! I love organizing!
I walked around and mingled and people started leaving. I don't think we got home until 10? My dad and Bryan unloaded the car and took everything up to Gabe's room.

Poor Julie had to leave right after the shower. Jaden was hysterical and both my dad and Nathan couldn't calm him down.

Gabe slept SO well Monday night. My mom said that he was awake during pretty much the whole shower. It must have pooped him out because he slept a lot on Tuesday. In between feedings I got on organizing all of the shower stuff. I started on Laundry because he got a lot of clothes and we got ready to go to another 30th surprise b-day party for Bryan's friend Kevin. We met everyone out at the place called Big Al's in Vancouver. This place is AWESOME!

It has:
30 traditional bowling lanes
12 lounge style bowling lanes
4,000 sq. ft. arcade / 100 player positions
1300 person party / event capacity
7,000 sq. ft. Sports Bar & Grill
One Gigantic Jumbo-Tron
(8 ft. tall x 36 ft. wide)
17 super bright projection screens
76 High Definition Plasma Screens
5 Private Party Rooms
7 Billiard Tables
1 Championship Shuffleboard Table





We were there for an hour or so and the guy's played pool while the girls sat up in some booths and talked. Dave and Shaela were there. I haven't seen them in FOREVER! I ended up talking with her pretty much the whole time. We talked about her kids and what we've been up too. It was great to see them. After we left Big Al's we went to Kevin and Ginger's and had cake and we left around 9.

We got another meal this week from the B's. Deanna brought us Chicken bisque. It was SO good. She dropped that off around 6 on Wednesday night and stayed for a few minutes and talked.
We have two more meals next week from Jay and Diane and Nate and Teresa. I am going to miss having meals! We have been so blessed by the class bringing us meals and they have been SO yummy. Some of the meals have lasted a couple days too. We have felt so loved!
It's hard some nights when Bryan is gone at school or youth group and I've had to fend for myself. The other night I put Gabe down to quickly make myself some dinner, and he got mad. I ended up holding him and eating at the counter. I remember Teresa telling me about all the times she had to eat standing up and stuff her face as fast as she could. I've even had to pee holding him sleeping happily. Have you ever tried washing your hands holding a baby. It's a little difficult.

I'm officially staying steady at 150!! I bought a couple capri's last week when I went to ON, size 10 and they fit pretty good. They are a little big, but I still can't fit in my 8's yet and a lot of my shirts still don't fit as well. This is frustrating! Bryan and I went on a walk yesterday and I tried walking with Calie and pushing the stroller to see how that worked out and Calie did well staying beside the stroller and not getting in front of it or pulling. I think I need to walk more and I can probably start doing sit-ups again. Bryan has these ones that he does that are hard, but they really do a good job. My goal is to get below 150 by next Saturday even if it is only 149.

Yesterday was Gabe's EDD! I can't believe it! I can no longer say that he's still supposed to be in my tummy.
He's been really focusing more and we've been putting toys in front of him to see if he can see them. We've also been working on Tummy Time and he's been working on lifting his head etc. He lifts his head a lot when we have him up on our chest too. He's starting to fill out. His little legs and feet don't look so skinny anymore and his cheeks are getting a little chubby.







Wednesday, May 16, 2007

I feel like crap

It's been the 6 weeks that they say to take it easy and I did for the most part...probably did some things that I shouldn't. My body is still out of whack though. I feel like crap all the time. My incision still hurts a little every once and a while, I feel like I'm going to throw up all the time, and I think there is something wrong with my vision.
After I had Gabe and I was pretty much dying the next day the anesthesiologist came to see how I was doing...she said that my right eye was droopy and I told her that I couldn't see very well either and she said that the spinal must have went up into my eyes. She said that she would check on me again, but I don't remember her doing that. I wonder if I should call my eye doctor or what? I can't wait till I feel good and my body is back to 100% if that is possible.

Saturday we all (well not all of us, Janell and Nathan were working) decided to go to Tebo's for lunch. We go there practically every Mother's Day and mom didn't want to go ON Mother's Day this year because they are crazy busy and we have Jaden and Gabe now. It ended up actually being just as busy...guess everyone else had the same idea as we did.
We sent dad and Bryan to Costco to pick up a few things. We were almost out of TP. Mom and I took Julie and Jaden home and took Gabe back to her house to meet dad and Bryan there. Bryan and dad hung out with Gabe and mom and I ran to Target quickly. I didn't end up getting anything...in fact I didn't even remember WHY I wanted to go there. I need SLEEP!
Bryan and I went home and I ended up sleeping HORRIBLE that night. Not because of Gabe, but because my shoulder hurt so bad. It was affecting my neck and arm too. I couldn't sleep at all...finally at 4am I took some IB Profen and took a bath to try and relax the muscle. That worked for a while, but the pain inevitably came back.

Bryan and I took Gabe to church for the first time and it was fun for our first time to be on Mother's Day. He did really well and it definitely was good to be back. After church we went over to my sister Julie's and sister Janell made us lunch and we hung out there for the afternoon. I felt sick all day, but it was fun hanging out with my family. This is really wearing me down. This is our last little get together at their apartment because they are moving into my parents in the next week or two.

I am loving this weather! Bryan and I got out yesterday and went for a walk. I was going to take Calie and Gabe myself tonight since Bryan is at YG, but he took the stroller with him in the car. oops! I love the sunshine and I am in serious need of some color too. I am pasty!

Pictures from the weekend.





This week is really busy for us. Good thing everything isn't packed into one or two days because I don't want to push Gabe and do too much.

Bryan has YG tonight.

Tomorrow
Me - Coffee with some girl's in our Sunday School class
Bryan - interview 2pm
Bryan - class 6pm

Friday
Gabe - weight appt 10am
Sunday School class dinner

Saturday
Travis's Surprise b-day party

Sunday
Church

Monday
Bryan - appt 12:30pm
Me - my shower 6:30pm
Bryan - Class 6pm

Tuesday
Kevin's surprise B-day party

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Uneventful

Life is pretty uneventful in our household, but fun too, getting to know Gabe and stuff. He's been having more awake time lately and sometimes it's in the middle of the night. He doesn't like to be in the moses basket when he's awake too. He wants to be held. He is SO stinkin cute too looking all around with big eye's. Bryan and I are enjoying every moment of this!



It's nice having Bryan home to help out and just have around, but it's getting down to crunch time, Unemployment keeps denying him and he didn't get the job at Nike that he interviewed for last week. He is very bummed because he was SO sure that he nailed the interview and was going to get the job. I felt so bad for him when he got the news. They said that there is another Graphic Design job opening up so hopefully he'll get an interview for that. What does God have in store for us next?
We don't really understand why he keeps getting denied Unemployment. It has something to do with school and his Youth Pastor job. He has a hearing or something I don't know I don't really understand it and it's freaking annoying. It didn't seem this hard when I was applying for Unemployment and Bryan deserves it. SIGH

Wednesday Bryan left to go meet Randy before Youth Group and they got dinner together. I was waiting for dinner from one of the couples from our Sunday School class, but never got a call and they were a no show. Gabe was pretty fussy that night. I couldn't put him down so I never got dinner that night. I tried to make myself a sandwich, but it didn't happen. It was just one of those nights. They finally called me about 8:45, but I knew they weren't coming by then. I kind of wish that they would have called me earlier to let me know they weren't coming, but oh well. We rescheduled for next Wednesday.

Yesterday I had my 6 week check up. NO MORE ST. V's! I'm kind of sad. Weird I know, but they have been my life pretty much since March. They took me off one medication and put me on a higher dose of one of the other ones I'm taking so I'm on 2 medications still. They are really pushing for me to go on Birth Control. She said that she doesn't want me to get pregnant for at least a year for sure because of what my body went through plus having a c-section. I told her that I wasn't planning on going on BC that I hadn't been on any for 3 years prior to getting pregnant and that I was doing the TCOYF method. That didn't satisfy her. She said accidents happen and we really really encourage you to go on a BC. So I don't know what I'm going to do yet? I have to follow up with my regular OB about that. They want me also to see a Family Practice dr that they recommend that has dealt with high risk patients that have hyper tension, so she is going to call me with some names that are close to where we live. I know the dr I have been seeing hasn't dealt that much with high risk patients.
Bryan and I dropped Gabe off at my mom's before going to my appointment and she told us to go on a lunch date afterwards. It wasn't quite lunch time yet so we just headed back to my moms and actually went up to her guest room and took a date nap instead. haha

Last night Moo came over and brought us pizza. She and Keira stayed for a while and chatted.

Today we have some errands to do.

Bryan - Get Calie's food
Bryan and Dad - Costco run (mom and I might go instead?)
Jenny - Target
Jenny - Craft Warehouse

Gabe's Arrival ~ 7 weeks early

I went to NW Perinatal for my weekly check up on my blood pressure and Gabe. They first took me back to have the ultrasound done. Gabe did well. He got a 6 out of 8 on his tests. He still wasn’t breathing consistently for 30 seconds so that is why he didn’t get an 8 out of 8. He does pass with a 6 though so they sent me back out to the waiting room to wait for the next test. I didn’t have to wait long before they called me back and hooked me up to the monitors to see if I was contracting and to monitor Gabe’s heart rate. He had just been moving around before we got to the office, but he had quieted down and his heart rate wasn’t as steady so they zapped him a couple times to get him awake and moving. The zapping thing doesn’t hurt the baby it just annoys them and tickles them a little. He still wouldn’t really move around and get his heart rate up a little like they wanted, so I had to go back in for another ultrasound and go through those tests again. They also got the approximate weight because they didn’t get that in the first ultrasound. They were a little concerned about Gabe. They took me to a different room to weight for the doctor (at this point I had been to like 5 rooms). The nurse took my blood pressure and it was HIGH (I don’t remember what the exact numbers were because I have had my blood pressure read about a million times since then). The doctor came in and took it again and told us that with their concern with Gabe’s tests and how high my blood pressure was that they were admitting me.
Just when you think you know how something is going to go…how it’ll be laid out…that you’ll be organized and have everything ready…God swoops in and says you’re not in control of this…I am! I was just saying to my mom, “I need to pack my bag!” I haven’t had a shower yet so I don’t have a lot of the essentials that I need. I am such a control freak it’s so hard to not to have control of every situation and have it go the way that you want it to go.
So, we were admitted on April 3rd, I put on a gown and they hooked me up to the monitors and a blood pressure cuff that went off every 15 min. They had me fill out menus and told me that I’d definitely be there for the long haul. My sister’s birthday was the next day and she old me that I wasn’t aloud to have my baby on her birthday. I screwed up her family b-day party…we were supposed to have it that night on the 3rd. They all came to see me and were up really late. They didn’t even have the party until 10:30 or something. I don’t think that she was mad at me though.
So, I ended up everyday just laying there getting poked and prodded. I was getting bored with nothing to do but watch TV and read. On the evening of the 5th my nurse told me that I was probably going to be in there for another 2 weeks because they really wanted to try and get me to 35 weeks. They had already given me steroids shots to help with Gabe’s lungs so they could take him at any time. I think that hearing that I would be just sitting in there for another 2 weeks and then hearing my puppy on the phone when I was talking to my sister, who took very good care of my puppy while we were gone. I just started crying. My hormones were all wacky and I think I was feeling pretty vulnerable. I did want what was best for me health wise, but mostly what was best for Gabe.
I went to sleep that night thinking I was now going to have to live at the hospital, but got woken up at one by the doctor. He turned on the lights and told me that after all the evaluating of my blood pressures and how Gabe was doing they wanted to get him out by noon. The doctor wanted to check if I was dilated at all and I was 1 cm so they put in something to soften my cervix (forgive me, I don’t remember what it was called. He came in at 1 in the morning…I was half asleep when he was telling me all this). After they put that in they all said OK get some good rest for tomorrow. UM yeah right…sleep now after you just told me that I will be having my baby in 11 hours. RIGHT
I did manage to fall asleep…I had to listen to my ipod though. The next morning the doctor came in and took that thing out and said that I was still only 1-2 cm dilated so he said that we could induce labor, but that would probably take another 12 hours and with your blood pressure and for the health of the baby we are going to suggest that we do a c-section. I was pretty out of it so I just nodded and said OK. The minute I said OK things got moving and they got moving FAST. They don’t mess around there that is for sure. As they were prepping me in the room, Bryan was getting scrubs on and my mom had to run around the room gathering all of our things to move to another room. I ended up losing my favorite pair of shoes that Bryan got me for my birthday…oh well gives me an excuse to go shopping! They are pretty strict at St. Vincent’s. Bryan had to wait outside the OR till they were done prepping me. They had a really hard time getting the spinal in me because I have mild scoliosis so it took a while and all I remember is shaking until they finally got me numb and laying down on the table. Bryan came in and held my hand and he stood up to watch. He couldn’t take any pictures or videotape the birth either, which I was a little bummed about. They didn’t want any interruptions while they worked. Surprisingly, Bryan did ok with watching it and he said it was so amazing to see the birth. Gabe came out crying and it was SO amazing to hear his little cry and briefly see him before they took him to the NICU.
He was born April 6th, at 1:59pm. He was 4lbs and 17 1/4 long. He was breathing on his own and didn’t have any complications.
Bryan left with him and I went to recovery. I was in recovery FOREVER. They of course couldn’t get my blood pressure down. I felt like CRAP. I was so tired and they had me on Magnesium Sulfate so that I wouldn’t have any seizures and that makes you feel like you’re going to die. I didn’t really know what was going on around me. When they wheeled my bed in to see Gabe…I got to hold him, but I don’t remember much about it or about the next 24-36 hours. Magnesium Sulfate is the devil! I think they took me off of it sometime on Saturday, but I didn’t feel myself until the next afternoon. The first time I went to see Gabe after off Magnesium and feeling a little better…I was still falling asleep and still didn’t feel 100% better, but it was worth it to see him. He is just so precious.
I got to go home Thursday the 12th after having about 12 hours of good blood pressures. I think my body is having a hard time adjusting to being pregnant and now not being pregnant. It was so good to go home, but SO hard to leave my little guy there at the NICU. We live about 45 minutes away from him so that is the hardest part, but worth every minute...