Letting go

Well we made it through the first week of the new changes. Everyone is adjusting pretty nicely. Bryan is really enjoying being back at Nike! I have to say all these changes were a little hard for me at first. I've never been a person who does well with change. It just takes some getting used too.
I didn't know that I would be so emotional about Bryan not being with Gabe on Wednesday's and Thursday's. Gabe has been very lucky to have his daddy around so much in the beginning of his life. Bryan was with us for the first 6 months of Gabe's life. Gabe had a lot of daddy bonding time and when Bryan went back to work it was only part time. Then they had daddy/son day's every Wednesday and Thursday's. I am so glad that Gabe is now with Teresa and Kam those day's, I feel so blessed to have so many people that are willing to help us out since I have to work. I'm just sad that they won't have those days together anymore.

The roof is almost finished. We had a few days of rainy weather so that slowed things down. Today they put up the new cutters. I'm pretty sure that by the end of the weekend or beginning of next week we'll have a new roof. ((thumbs up))

Gabe did really well with Aunt Teresa this week. He slept well for her at nap time, ate well (except for the lemon blueberry muffins I made. He HATES blueberry's) and they had fun hanging out. He loves Aunt Teresa and Kambrie. He smiles and gets excited when he sees Kambrie. It's very cute!

OK so the title of this post "Letting go"...A couple weeks ago we had a guest speaker at church and I really liked him. At one part of his sermon he talked about a missionary couple that had a ton of kids and every time they would pray and give them up to God. Basically, let go of them and give complete control to God. My mom had a hard time letting go of us three girls and I never really truly understood that until I had Gabe. All a mother wants to do is protect her child from everything, anything that could hurt them. You can't! If you think you have control, you don't!
I say this because lately Gabe has been falling a lot! A LOT! He's walking better but he still falls and almost every time he does he hits his head hard! I WANT CONTROL! I want to somehow prevent this! I can't. Tonight I lost it! He has this huge bruise on his head from falling at moms today and then as I was getting out of the truck tonight, I was squeezing between the car and truck door. Bryan was shutting the door and I thought I was in the clear but nope...WHAM! I hit Gabe's head on the mirror. He starts crying immediately. I feel horrible. He's safe and sound asleep in his bed probably doesn't even remember that his mom whammed his head on the side mirror but I can't stop crying.
Is this normal? I don't know if I just don't pay attention, but I don't see other kids hitting their head on everything. I don't know if I just have this paranoia from when I was watching Kaleb and Garren one time? (Long story short - We were getting into my car and it was pouring down rain. Kaleb was stepping into my car and his shoe slipped and he fell and hit his head on my car. HUGE black, red and blue welt within seconds. He cried, I cried...HORRIBLE I thought he was going to die) Am I the only one whose whammed their kids head? I feel like I am.
I probably sound like a lunatic right now. I am just tired of it. I don't want him to hurt anymore. I hate looking at the bumps and bruises. I'm sure worse things are going to happen over the years...I guess I just feel like it's my responsibility to make sure that he's ok. I don't feel like I've done a good job at it. :(
Letting go of the control that I feel like I need to have is going to be harder then I thought.

Happy Memorial Day!

It's raining! BLAH

Truth be told though, it's been pretty fun just hanging out inside this weekend watching movies, cleaning, playing with our little man and doing homework. We had plans to go to the zoo yesterday, but it rained off and on. We want to go on a nice day when all the animals are out and about.

For my birthday Bryan and Teresa both gave me this awesome cook book by Jessica Seinfeld. Deceptively Delicious

Exactly what I was wanting! I love this book! Especially lately, because I cannot get Gabe to eat his veggies. He spits them out or "secretly" puts them behind his back.

What's for dinner (Friday night):

Spaghetti Pie (with Broccoli and carrots)

Nonstick cooking spray
3 ounces whole-wheat spaghetti or angel hair pasta
1/2 pound lean ground turkey
1/2 cup broccoli puree
1 large egg white
2 tablespoons grated Parmesan
2 cloves garlic
2 cups bottled tomato sauce
1 cup lowfat (1%) cottage cheese
1/4 cup carrot puree
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1 cup shredded mozzarella

Preheat oven to 350 coat a 9-inch pie plate with cooking spray.

Bring a large pot of salted water to boil, ass the pasta, and cook until al dente. Drain in a colander.

In a small bowl, mix the ground turkey with the broccoli puree, egg white, Parmesan and garlic. Form the mixture into 1/2 balls.

In a large bowl, stir in the cooked pasta, tomato sauce, cottage cheese, carrot puree and salt and pepper. Spoon the mixture into the pie plate and smooth the top. Scatter meatballs on top and sprinkle with mozzarella. Bake, uncovered, until the center is firm and the cheese is bubbly, 25 to 30 min.

Bryan and Gabe both loved it! So it was yummy and Gabe got his veggies unaware!

Saturday morning Gabe got up around 7 and Bryan got up with him so that I could sleep a little longer. What a guy! They did breakfast and I woke up to Gabe jabbering away at Bryan as they played in the living room. I got up and went down to be with them.
When Gabe went down for a nap I went down to the garage and I started going through everything. I got rid of a ton of empty boxes that were taking up way too much room. I organized a ton and took over a few things that my mom and sister let me borrow when Gabe was little. The swing, bouncer, bedside bed that Gabe slept in, in our room. We don't have an attic in this house, well I take that back, we do but nothing we can store stuff in. It's a tiny crawl space area basically. I did a ton of laundry and then I cleaned the basement up and the bathroom etc. It was a VERY productive day for me. Bryan did homework most of the day, he helped me move a few big items and mowed the lawn. When Bryan mowed the lawn I blew bubbles outside for Gabe. He loved it! He laughed when Calie jumped and jumped trying to eat all the bubbles. He had a blast outside just walking all over the deck and watching dad mow the lawn. He was actually mad when I took him inside because it looked like it was going to rain. I was right too. We had thunderstorms Saturday evening. The sky was beautiful!


Sunday we skipped church. Bryan rarely gets the chance to do that so since he is on sabbatical right now and is down to crunch time with school we skipped. Bryan got up with Gabe again. I slept in until 9 and then we switched. I hung out with Gabe and Bryan went back to bed for a couple hours. It's been such a relaxing weekend and I think we're going to be glad because our schedules about to be super crazy!
For lunch we met my mom, Nathan, Julie, Jaden, Jacob and Janell at the downtown Spaghetti Factory. Dad was in WA with my Grandma and Grandpa helping pack up more of my uncles things. We walked around outside for a while and the boy's had a blast running. I wanted to go to the mall after lunch but Gabe had a poopoo and we needed to take him home and clean it up. He has a massive diaper rash and the wipes hurt him so bad that we've been having to use warm wash cloths. My poor baby!
We ended up coming home and I got Gabe all cleaned up and settled with a pile of Desitin all over his privates and he went down for another nap and I vegged in front of the TV for a little bit while Bryan continued to do school work. Sunday evening we had a BBQ at my moms. Just Gabe and I went. Nathan barbecued chicken and we had cole slaw, watermelon and chips. Then we made a fire in their fire pit and did smore's. It was a lot of fun!


Today we have a few errands that we need to do. We need to go to BRU and get a carseat for Teresa. I also need to pick up a few other odds and ends. We need to go grocery shopping and then when I get home I need to send Teresa an email about Gabe's schedule. I need to make some meals for the week and get everything ready for the 4 day work week.

Bryan starts at Nike tomorrow and Patrick will also be here starting on the roof process. They decided not to do it this weekend.

Happy Memorial Day all!

It's time to strip...

...off our old roof!
Patrick (T's brother) came out today and did an assessment of our roof.

I can't remember if I blogged about this, but about 3 months ago we had a leak. We had a guy from our church come out and look at it. He found cracks and soft spots in the shake. He patched up the cracks that he could get to and recommended that we replace the roof ASAP.

Patrick just went over all of the details and costs with Bryan and if things fall into place, they will strip off our old roof this weekend and put the new one on possibly Monday. WOW things are happening so fast!

Tonight Gabe and I went to Walmart and then drove through the new developments in Happy Valley. I wanted to look at the different colored roofs to get an idea of what I liked.
We picked Black Walnut.

Here is a picture of what it looks like on a house.

Picture of the week

Gabe loves his Crocs with a "K"!
(He was trying to carry all of them at once)

I want the sun to come back!!!

It's been nasty icky outside the last two day's. I want the sun to come back!

Yesterday work of course. Bryan and I left around 6:30am, Gabe had just woken up. He's been waking up a little earlier lately. Kind of annoying, but I can't really complain because he's always been a pretty good sleeper. I think it may have to do with his teeth. He's getting three all at the same time and it seems to be painful.

He did not want to go to Janell as I was trying to say goodbye and pass him over to her. Breaks my heart to have to leave him. Sniff. When I called Janell around 12:30 they sounded like they were having a lot of fun though. I could hear him in the background talking away. I have been staying up WAY too late at night this week. I am exhausted. It's funny, this guy at work, Tyson barely ever sleeps. He had told us last week that he maybe gets 4 hours of sleep every night. WTHeck? How does one live on that? He sure does get a lot done though. SO my plan last Friday was to be like Tyson and get a ton done even if I had to stay up really late Friday night and get up with Gabe early the next morning. Guess what? I never made it past 8pm. I fell asleep on the couch. Yeah that worked out well. How does he do it?! ;)
I started feeling SO sleepy around 4 yesterday and so when my dad picked me up around 4:15 I closed my eye's and rested the whole way home. I met Janell at their house which actually I shouldn't have. I wanted to change my clothes and get some comfy clothes on so I should have met Janell at home. OH WELL. I stole a velur outfit from Julie. HA

Everyone left me and went to dinner and I fed Gabe before heading to Nate and Teresa's to hang out with Kambrie. It was my turn for the babysit swap that we do. When I got into the car I noticed the gas light was on. (Note to self: Leave gas card with Janell on Tuesday's) I was a little panicked because I needed to stop and get gas but I also left my moms house a little later then I wanted. I decided to stop for Gas though because I was scared that I would run out completely. Drove up, got situated, opened the gas door, got my gas card and the guy walked up to me and told me that their computers were down and that he couldn't pump me some gas. DOH! Now what do I do? I ended up driving to T's and crossing my finger's that I could make it to a gas station when I left afterwards. That is so stressful. I have ran out of gas once before in that car so I was scared.

We had so much fun with Kambrie last night. At first she was pretty mellow. She watched some sponge bob in their big leather chair and around 6:20 she ate some dinner. She actually ate the whole thing and never asked me for a treat. At one point we went up to her room and played. She got some toys out for Gabe and she actually laid on her bed for about 10-15 mins. T mentioned that she hadn't taken a nap so she must have been tired. Kam is SO good with Gabe…she helps him and plays with him. At one point during the evening Gabe was getting tired fussy and she was obviously annoyed by his wining which actually I was too. HA She looked at me and said, "I just need some peace and quiet around here!" I was totally cracking up. We played tag and hide-and-go-seek. Kambrie went to hide when it was her turn and I picked up Gabe and went into the kitchen to count and after I said "ready or not here I come" I put Gabe down and told him to find her and he waddled right over to the pillows she was hiding behind and pulled the one pillow off of her. She screamed BOO and Gabe smiled. It was so cute. I think Gabe saw her hide behind the pillows as I was walking out of the room. Heehee

We ended up making it to a gas station THANK GOODNESS and HOLY COW it was almost $50. I remember when the car only took about $30. This sucks.

Gabe didn't fall asleep in the car but when we got home I gave him his milk and put him in bed and I didn't hear another peep out of him. He was tired!
After I got him down Bryan got home and started gathering the garbage up to set outside and I unloaded the dishwasher and cleaned up the kitchen.

Gabe is rarely crawling anymore. He still falls a lot when walking but he wants to walk everywhere and boy does he think he's a cool dude. He walks around talking a mile a minute. He smiles and laughs. It is the cutest thing ever!

Quick update from work...

Internet and Phone have been down for 3 day’s, but cable has been fine?? Bryan called on Saturday and they looked at a few things and Bryan re-set the modem and the sales lady said that we should be fine. 2 mins later both the internet and phone line were down again.
What the Heck!?!?
Comcast won’t be out until Wednesday morning.
Thank goodness Bryan hasn’t needed the internet for homework, but I’m frustrated because I’m behind on reading blogs and updating my own. grrrr

Life Changes

Just when I thought life would become a little less hectic, Bryan goes and gets a 2nd job. :) Bryan's friend from Nike emailed him and told him about a job opening up on his team. His manager specifically asked for Bryan's info. It ended up being a 3 month temp position and Bryan let them know that he was in 52 Ltd's (creative temp agency) database. He let them know that he was interested in position.
Bryan and I had a big talk about it last Thursday and we thought that Bryan would have to put in his 2 weeks at Multnomah, but when he talked to his boss he said that they really don’t want to lose Bryan. They are willing to scale back Bryan’s hours there since he is part time anyway and work around Nike’s hours to make it work. Then if the Nike position doesn’t turn into a full time gig after the 3 months he will have his job at Multnomah still and can have his 25 hours back. What a blessing and how nice of them to do that. Course I thought I never saw Bryan before. Check out this schedule starting May 27th.

MONDAY June 2nd, June 9th
Drop off Gabe
Nike 8-5
Multnomah 6-9

TUESDAY May 27th, June 3rd, June 10th
Nike
Class 12:45-4:30
Class 6:00-9:45

WEDNESDAY May 28th, June 4th, June 11th
Drop Gabe off
Nike 8-5
Multnomah 6-9

THURSDAY May 29th, June 5th
Drop Gabe off
Nike 8-5
Class 6-8:45 ??June 12th??

FRIDAY May 30th, June 6th,(June 13th OFF Graduation Day)
Drop Gabe off
Nike
Homework

SATURDAY May 31st, June 7th
Multnomah 7-4
Homework

SUNDAYS – Church and Homework

This schedule is subject to change June 13th. Only 31 day’s, 751 hours and 45114 minutes until Bryan GRADUATES, but who’s counting!? ;)

When I found out about the position and that Bryan was interested in it. My mind started whirling. What were we going to do about daycare for Gabe on Wednesday’s and Thursday’s? I thought about downstairs in my building at the Y. I wasn’t sure if they had room though? I decided to throw it out to Teresa and see what she thought. I told her that I would not be offended at all if she was like NO WAY! We set up a meeting to go over things and talk everything through. In no way would we want this to ruin our friendship. We met at Starbuck’s at Gresham Station and had a really nice talk. T said that she thought it through and even talked to Kambrie about it and they both decided that it would be fun to have Gabe 2 day’s a week. I can’t even tell you what a relief it is to know that he'll be with them and that this all worked out. Teresa, you are amazing! Words can't express my gratitude for what you are doing for us. When we looked at the calendar too there was only 1 day that there could possibly be a conflict and Teresa was able to move the appointment to another day.
I have to say I am a little jealous that mom, Janell, Teresa and Kambrie get to have tons of fun with my Gabey and during the fun summer days too. ;)

What a trooper

Coughing, congestion, sneezing, oxygen levels low, ear infection and finally we have a tooth.
Gabe -- what a trooper! He just can't seem to catch a break.

My poor, helpless, baby has suffered all of the above for the last 4 days. It was awful. We didn't know he had anything 'till Sunday night when we had to take him the ER. It hit so fast. He got up from his nap on Sunday and I fed him dinner but a little bit after that I noticed that he was having a horrible time breathing. He also had been coughing. I checked his temp and it wasn't too high. 100º and he was obviously super uncomfortable and it was just one of the most heartbreaking mommy-moments, yet. There was no way to take it away. Awful.

We went to ST.Vincents...I know it's far away, but I had heard that whenever we needed to take him to the ER that we should take him to either Emmanuel or St. V's. My insurance doesn't cover Emmanuel. What a weird feeling driving out there and parking in the parking garage where we spent so many days and nights when Gabe was born. Brought back a lot of memories.

We got right in. The check in nurse took his weight, temperature and oxygen levels. She didn't say if anything was abnormal. However, as soon as we went to sit down in the lobby they called Gabe's name. That was confirmation to us that we made the right decision, taking him in.

They had us put a little gown on him. He looked SO cute, but it was so sad too. The nurse came in and listened to his lungs. She gave us a tube thing to hold up to his nose and mouth that was connected to oxygen. He didn't like it, but it was obviously making him feel better.




The Dr. came in and had us re-explain his symptoms. I guess because of my explanation of his symptoms, she asked me if I was a nurse. I was like, "UM NO!" She also listened to his lungs and ordered an x-ray just to make sure he didn't have pneumonia. The x-ray tech came to take us to the room and I offered to go. When we got to the room and she explained what Gabe was going to have to do to get the x-ray, I suddenly wished Bryan would have taken him. It was AWFUL! He had to stick his legs through these two holes and I had to hold his arms straight up while she closed these plastic walls around him to hold him still. He cried and cried. Thankfully it didn't last too long. We went back to the room and waited for the results and they also gave him steroids. We waited a little longer and the Dr. came in and said that she didn't see any pneumonia and that his oxygen levels were much better.

They sent us home with an inhaler with a chamber tube and a little rubber face mask. It doesn't mean that he has asthma, it's just supposed to help with the breathing issues. We got home around 1 or 2 and we were all exhausted.

Monday I wrote an email to my team at work and stayed home with Gabe. He was very weak and lethargic. He didn't leave my side all day. Mom came over that evening and snuggled with Gabe a little bit. We also called his pediatrician because he was burning up, he was having a hard time breathing again and he was whimpering. We gave him some Tylenol and Ibuprofen and got some Pedialyte down him. He finally fell asleep on my mom. He was so miserable. It broke my heart.
He woke up at 2 in the morning burning up and shaking. We took his pj's off, gave him more Tylenol and Ibuprofen and some water and we just rocked until he fell asleep again.
Tuesday morning we went to see a different pediatrician because his pediatrician wasn't in that day. He checked him out and we found out that he also has an ear infection on top of everything else. Second one in two months. I hope he's not taking after me. I had chronic ear infections when I was little and had to have tubes in my ears twice.

Gabe is starting to feel a little better.
Tonight Gabe and I were reading books and he had his bink in his mouth. I took it out and said "you don't need that" and he smiled really big (first one in a couple days). I saw something when he smiled so I put my finger in his mouth and lo' and behold there was a little toofer poking out. FINALLY I was SO excited. I called Bryan's cell, even though he was in class. I tried my mom, sister...no one. I had to tell someone. Bryan texted me "WHAT?" so I texted him back "can you call me real quick" He called in about 5 minutes and Gabe and I told daddy that he cut his first tooth. heehee

Please pray for us, that Gabe will continue to get well.

Uncle David Oct 18, 1953 - April 20, 2008

This last weekend Gabe and I went up to WA with my mom, Julie and Jaden. Dad was already up there.
We ended up getting there around lunch time on Saturday. Went straight to grandma's. It was strange walking in knowing that Uncle David wouldn't be there.

Neko his dog greeted us at the door. Dad says that he's been pretty sad. He's not eating well and he lays by Uncle David's bed. Makes me SO sad. I made sure to give him lots of love.

The boy's got reacquainted with their Great Grandma and Great Grandpa. We talked for a while and then Gabe went down for a nap. Julie, Jaden and I went to the store to get a few things. When we got back my cousins were there and we left to go to dinner at Red Robin. Mom and dad watched the boy's. It was kind of fun just us cousins. I think it's been 15 years since I've seen Naomi and Miriam. They shared with us how they're feeling…the things that they have been doing the last few day's, with my dad, going through Uncle David's things. It was great to catch up and just kind of talk about everything. I think we were there for a few hours and probably could've stayed longer.

Naomi told us that one time they were all in Uncle David's room going through things and my Grandpa walked in and said that he was going to help. She said that he went into the dressing room for about 45 minutes. When he came out he had his arms folded with a large pile of socks. He looked at them and said, "I'm taking these" They all looked at him and said, "grandpa, you were in there for 45 minutes and all you came up with was socks?" He replied "well they're NOT going to fit you!" HA My grandpa is a funny guy.

We stayed at the Motel 6 that we always stay at when we go there. It's about 10 minutes from my grandma's and it's a nicer one which is nice. Gabe and I got our own room and Julie, mom and Jaden stayed in a room right next door. We didn't want Jaden and Gabe waking each other up during the night.

So after dinner with the cousin's Julie and I met my mom and the boy's back at the Motel for bed.

I got to bed pretty early because I didn't want Gabe to wake up so I didn't watch any TV and had the lights off. Gabe woke up at 1 and I brought him to bed with me and that was stupid. He moves around SO much. He rolled and rolled. At one point he smacked me right in the face. I decided to put him back in the pack n play at that point. He woke up at 4 crying so I changed him and gave him a bottle and he fell back to sleep and we slept till 9. When we got up I got him ready and started packing everything up. Gabe had breakfast and I put him in the pack n play to play with his toy's while I showered. Dad had stayed at Grandma's so he came back that morning to help us pack up and we headed to Matt and Jessica's house. She was having us over for lunch. There was quite a crowd. Me, Gabe, Julie, Jaden, Mom, Dad, Aunt Lolly, Jessica, Matt, Caleb, Kirsten, New baby boy Brennon, Naomi, Miriam, And Aunt Kim. It was a lot of fun. We shared stories and laughed a lot. It was a great time. Around 3 I think Dad, Julie and Jaden drove back home. Jaden had a fever and we weren't sure why, but he just wasn't having a good time. :o( Poor thing has just not gotten a break.

Mom, Gabe and I left Jessica's around 5 I think and we went to Grandma's. Mom wanted to spend some time with Grandma. We didn't get on the road until 8ish and didn't get home till 10:30.

Gabe, BTW, did fabulous on the way up and back.
SIDE NOTE: a couple days after Gabe turned one we switched him to whole milk. We noticed that since then he's been extra whinny, moody and kind of aggressive. Last weekend we switched him to soy milk and wow what a difference. He's a new baby! MUCH BETTER!

Monday - work
Tuesday - work (mom and dad went back up)

Yesterday we got up at 5 and took showers. We got on the road by 7:15 carpooling with Nathan and Julie and made it up to my Grandma's by 9:30 safely.
Everyone was dressed and ready to go (we had to be at Tahoma National Cemetery at 10:15am) Bryan, Nathan, Julie and I got dressed in our nice clothes and we were off. When we arrived, there were already a ton of cars in line waiting. They had us go to the front of the line since we were family and we proceeded to the commencement area.
It was a beautiful day yesterday. A bit chilly but the sun was out and that cemetary was really pretty. We all got situated. There were 10 chairs total. It went, from left to right…my aunt (uncles ex wife), Miriam (27), Naomi (28), my grandma, and my grandpa. The next row from right to left was my dad, mom, aunt Lolly, cousin Jessica and one chair was empty (wishing Uncle Kim was there to sit in that seat). The rest of the family gathered behind them and more friends and family behind us. They started the service. Because my uncle was in the military, he was given military honors.




It was so hard watching them hand the flag to my cousin. It's such an emotional thing when someone is honored. When they did the 21 gun salute we covered Gabe's ears, but it still terrified him. His eye's got HUGE and he started to cry, but as soon as it was done he was ok.
After the service we mingled with everyone for a while and then we went over to the wall where we laid him to rest. Now that was a difficult thing to watch. Grandpa did it and then we left while Naomi and Miriam stayed to say goodbye to their dad.


We went to The Keg for lunch. My dad's cousin's made a little slide show of Uncle David with the song "dont cry for me" by Brad Paisley and Dolly Parton.

When I get where I'm going
On the far side of the sky
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly

I'm gonna land beside a lion
And run my fingers through his mane
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain

[Chorus]
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

I'm gonna walk with my grand daddy
And he'll match me step for step
And I'll tell him how I missed him
Every minute since he left
Then I'll hug his neck

[Repeat chorus]

So much pain and so much darkness
In this world we stumble through
All these questions I can't answer
So much work to do

But when I get where I'm going
And I see my maker's face
I'll stand forever in the light
Of his amazing grace
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
Hallelujah
I will love and have no fear
When I get where I'm going
Yeah when I get where I'm going

We all ate lunch and just hung out. Everyone started leaving around 2 and we said our goodbye's to Aunt Kim, Naomi and Miriam. I don't think that we'll see them for a while. Aunt Kim lives in Burma, Naomi lives in NY and Miriam lives in Mexico. Good thing is that Aunt Kim does have a house in WA and we can visit them in the summer. I really want to keep in touch.

Here is all the cousin's

Us with all the kids

Mom and Aunt Kim (who acted like they were best friends and like they see each other everyday)

Naomi and I

My Grandpa with no teeth and Miriam

We left and went back to Grandma's. Changed and Bryan took Neko for a walk. Neko pulls a little and my poor Grandpa can't handle him when he does that. They have a ton of hills around their house and Neko literally pulled my Grandpa down.
Dad went through some more things in Uncle David's room and Gabe had fun playing/walking/ crawling around.
He has been in such a good mood lately. Always smiling, laughing and talking. I am so glad we took him off whole milk. He did so well yesterday.
We left around 5 to head home. Mom cried all the way home. I got teary a few times. I am just physically and emotionally drained. What a day!

When will the sadness go away?

I will miss you, Uncle David!

Administrative Professionals Day

I totally did not know that today was Administrative Professionals Day. When I got to work this morning there was a present on my chair. It was a cute brown bag with light blue lettering on it that said Dosha Salon Spa. I opened the card and it was from my team. They gave me a gift certificate to Dosha. YAHOO! I see a massage in my future! :)
That's not it either. A little later Randy brought me my favorite coffee and a card with a GC in it from the leadership team.

I feel so blessed today!

Last night Gabe and I went over to Nate and Teresa's to hang out with Kambrie while they went out on a date night. We have SO much fun! Here are a few pics of the fun we had.

All three of us with Mr potato heads glasses on
(Sorry they're dark because I took them with my phone. My camera is broken)

Kambrie doing her funny dance

Sad Day

My dad called me this afternoon and told me he had some bad news. My stomach tighten the instant I heard him say that. He told me that my Uncle David (dad's brother) had died. WHAT? HOW? He had gone to workout and had a massive heart attack and died there at the gym. The police came to my grandparents door to tell them. My uncle lived with them. He and my aunt have been divorced for I don't know how long now. He just turned 55 and was a healthy man. I guess my cousin Naomi is taking it really hard. She lives in NY and I assume hasn't seen him since her wedding which was two years ago. I don't think anyone could get a hold of Miriam to tell her.

This is all a complete shock. I haven't really lost anyone in my family before. Someone I was close to. My grandma (mom's mom) passed away from cancer when I was three and my grandpa (mom's dad) passed in 94' I think? I wasn't that close to him due to him not being around when I was growing up.

I haven't been that close with my uncle for a while. I did get to spend some time with him almost a year ago...I am so glad I decided to take the trip up there with my family that day. I almost didn't. We were very close when I was little. I lived with them for a summer one year. He always made me laugh.

Been crying off and on all day. I'm so sad...just wish I could have one more moment with him.

Status

weather-overcast (BLAH - thanks for the tease)
house-needs cleaning
laundry-neverending
wardrobe-lacking
gabe-almost walking
creative juices-flowing
motivation/money-lacking
bryan-back at school
car's-need cleaning
office-overflowing
watching-too much tv
God-always faithful
life-good
love-lots

Look up idiot in the dictionary...

And you'll see a picture of me! Seriously I am an idiot!

After work I came home and Bryan left for class. About 30 mins. after Bryan left I had a girl came to my door and asked if I wanted the carpet cleaned in one room of the house, free of charge. ALL I had to do was tell my friends and family about the product. RIGHT

Like the idiot I am, I let them in because I really wanted my living room carpet cleaned and free is a good price, right? I didn't purchase the product, which BTW cost $2500.00, BUT I did lose 3 hours 3 HOURS of my life that I will never get back.
I thought I was going to be able to do my nightly routine, give Gabe a bath, pack his bag, eat dinner etc. while he cleaned, but he kept me in the living room wanting to show me how "GREAT" this product was. In all fairness the product was pretty good. I would have kicked the nice guy out (who actually went to my HS, which was weird) but the manager left him here and didn't come back forever (she was his ride). He even called her to come get him and ended watching American Idol with me.

So to reiterate, I AM AN IDIOT, but my carpet's clean.

Happy 1st Birthday Gabe!

Sunday my Gabey turned 1!

We had such a fun farm party! We had so many people come and Gabe received awesome presents! (Thanks everyone who came!) He was so happy the whole day-cruising around getting tons of attention.

Present Time

We had pizza, salad, soda, peach tea, pig/lamb/chick cupcakes and dixie-cups. I still can't believe that my baby is one!

Cake time

Now, for a trip down memory lane…

“Lord, please keep my little guy healthy!”

Mom came over this morning at 6:30 to watch Gabe at our house. When I went down stairs I saw that it was SNOWING A LOT. What is up with this weather we’re having? I now see blue sky and the sun is peaking through the clouds. SO random.

Gabe is finally feeling better. He went in to see Dr. Mary on Monday and she prescribed him Amoxicillin because he was on the brink of an ear infection and she wanted to try and head it off with the medicine before it became a full blown infection. Coughing has died down and the runny nose is pretty much gone. YAHOO!

We decided to have mom over at our house because Jaden is still deathly sick. Poor thing. My heart is breaking for him and for mama. They took him to emergency on Easter Sunday and they ended up admitting him. His oxygen was way to low and he was dehydrated. He also had Pneumonia. He had an IV and had to be on oxygen. Julie and my mom said that he would just lie in their arms so weak and frail. They figured out that because he was about 13 weeks early and his lungs weren’t developed completely that there is scaring on his lungs and that he has trouble breathing due to Asthma. He has to have an inhaler for at least a year and they’ll reevaluate. Julie called me yesterday pretty calm but I just can’t imagine what she must be going through physically and emotionally. Jaden was up all night Wednesday night throwing up and then yesterday Jaden walked away from Julie and she noticed that he was all wet. Every time he eats he has a blow out and mom told me this morning that he’ll walk around a little bit but has to lie down for a while to gain some energy back. I guess the throwing up and the diarrhea is from the meds. He’s lost a pound and looks horrible. :o( I just want to snuggle him.

So Easter has been pretty uneventful in our household the last couple of years. Last year I was in the hospital and this year was sick.
Bryan left for church on Easter and had called me while I was trying to get something out of Calie’s mouth in which she accidently ended up biting my finger, Gabe was crying/screaming which ended in me crying. We were all a total mess so he actually came home instead because he thought we might have needed him more. It was just one of those moments that you just lose it.
My mom and I combined an Easter basket for Gabe this year. He got 3 books, some bubbles, strawberry and apple puffs and a pair of shorts with a shirt that goes with it. He loves the bubbles. The other night he was in hysterics because when I blew the bubbles Calie was jumping everywhere eating the bubbles. I think I lost a few ounces from laughing so hard. Bryan had to come investigate what was going on too since he wasn’t with us and could hear us laughing. How can you NOT have fun playing with your kid’s. I just LOVE it! I don’t think I have ever laughed SO much. I love the little personality that he’s getting. It reminds me a lot of Bryan.

Our turn for the date swap (sounds like a TV show HA)! We were supposed to go out last Saturday, but Gabe still wasn’t 100% so T and I talked about tonight instead. I think we’re going to Olive Garden for dinner. I have a GC and also someone gave us $20 to go on a date together. (((thumbs up)))

T just wrote me an email and told me something funny that Kambrie said today. haha

Kambrie is so funny she said "tell aunt Jenny what I need to eat" I said
"actually she isn't babysitting you, we are babysitting Gabe" and she said
"well, thats CONFUSING. I want her to babysit me" I said "she will next month"
she said "tomorrow?" I said "no next month" she said "tomorrow?" I said "I'll
let you know when it gets here"

The light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter…

2 finals down 2 to go!
Bryan WHO’S Bryan? OH he’s that random guy up in the office who I see pop out every once in a while.
Finals are over today and Bryan has two weeks off before he starts his last and FINAL term at The Art Institute of Portland. He has three classes, two on Tuesday and one on Thursday.

I have already started my “honey do” list for him. HA

oops

I was getting Gabe's bath ready tonight and Bryan carried him into the bathroom after undressing him. Gabe decided that daddy needed a shower too. hee hee

Date Swap

Teresa came up with this cool idea to do a date swap with us. I watch Kambrie once a month so that she and Nate can go out alone and they watch Gabe once a month so that Bryan and I can go out. Last night after work I met Janell at my parent’s house. She watches Gabe every Tuesday at our house and usually takes him over in our car to my parent’s house around 3:30-4. She had brought me a change of clothing so I quickly changed and then left for Nate and Teresa’s. I got there around 5:15 and K had just woken up from her nap. She looked excited to see us. Teresa gave me the scoop and then they left for their 8th year Anniversary date night. In the past I think I have watched Kambrie every year but one on their Anniversary. Last year they even brought us home a treat. K got a cool menu from the restaurant they went too and I got a book of matches. K and I asked if they were going to bring us home another treat this year. haha
After they left K showed me the new layout of her room. T rearranged some stuff. We got some toys for Gabe to play with and then we sat and read some books. Around 6:30 we got ready for dinner. Gabe finished before K so I let him get down…bad move. He can stand up at her little table and at first I thought oh he won’t try and get anything, but Kambrie was freaking out that he was going to get her food. Sure enough he got a hold of her peaches and dumped some of it on the floor, on Lee and on himself. I hurried and took the peaches out of Gabe’s hand, picked up Lee and put him in his kennel while I stripped Gabe down and tried to clean up the mess. K had finished eating and so we went upstairs and put on her nightgown and she and Gabe were playing in her room. K shut all the doors to the other rooms and I shut the gate and went down to get Lee cleaned up. I told K to call me if she needed me. The monitor was on so I could hear everything they were doing. Sheesh I kind of saw what it feels like to have 2 kids during a crazy time. K did great with Gabe…she’s a little helper. I went back up after cleaning Lee up and we read a few books up in her room. Gabe was standing near her bed…it was just the right height for him. It was really funny…all night with certain things K would say “that is really special to me” meaning she didn’t want Gabe to touch it. At one point I was rocking him in T’s rocking chair and she has this bowl of decorative balls in it and Gabe wanted them. I told Gabe NO that those were No touches and K said “because those are VERY special to mommy” heehee
When Nate and Teresa got home Gabe and I left. Gabe fell asleep right away in the car and didn’t wake up when we transferred him to his bed.

Now Bryan and I have to figure out what we’re going to do for our date night!

We had a fun weekend!

After being sicker then I have been in a long time and using my personal days to stay home, I was back to work Thursday and Friday. I had a lot of catching up to do. Thursday and Friday flew by. After work on Friday I rode Max transit to Gateway and met Moo there. She picked me up and we left to go to dinner at Claim Jumper for our birthdays! I must have really been into my work Friday because when I got to the lobby of my building I noticed that it was pouring outside and was shocked. Thankfully I had my umbrella with me.
We drove the back roads to Claim Jumper. The freeway was NASTY just like it always is on Friday’s. I had made a reservation because otherwise you have to wait a long time. We made it just in time. We had to park in the boonies though. I had opened my umbrella and Moo said “Let’s run!” and started to run…all of the sudden she was gone! I looked down and she had fallen. There was a pretty deep hole in the road and Moo stepped right into it. Her pants were all wet and she thought she might have skinned her knee. Wasn’t expecting that hole to be there that’s for sure. We made our way to the restaurant and almost got hit by a van that was pulling way too fast out of his parking spot and finally made it in. We got seated right away. As we were walking in I saw my sister’s friend Christina. Hugged her and said hi. After we sat down Moo saw some friend’s of Travis’s so she went and said hi to them. Our waitress ended up being Tiffany Gosvenor. Her family used to go to our church so Moo and I have known her since she was little. We ordered and just sat and talked. We ended up seeing Debbie from our Sunday school class too. That place is popular! Moo and I were making fun a few things on the menu. One of them being the world’s smallest chocolate sundae. Well Moo ended up getting that for dessert and I got this humongous ice cream sandwich (which by the way I took maybe 5 bites of and Bryan was more than happy to share the rest with me later haha). We ended up going back to Moo’s house and hanging out there for a while. We had a really good time. We didn’t go out last year for our birthdays so this year more than made up for it. HA
Bryan and Gabe came and got me and we went home. I got to snuggle with Gabe and put him down for bed and I was going to stay up and putter around on the computer but I was wiped out so I ended up going to be too.

Gabe woke up around 6:30-7 on Saturday morning. I fed him breakfast and then he played in the living room while I cleaned up the kitchen. Bryan left to meet with our tax preparer and I played with Gabe and started cleaning up the house. Gabe went down for his first nap around 9:30. Usually if he gets up kind of early he goes down 2-3 hours later. I took that opportunity to get in the shower and get ready. Bryan got home around 10:30 and he put away his bedding stuff that he’d been using since he hadn’t been sleeping with me. We left and got coffee’s with a SB gift card I got for my birthday and went to watch Kaleb’s basketball game. Both his team and the other team were undefeated so it was a fun game to watch and Kaleb’s team won! Gabe did really well he watched the game in my lap and he liked it when the ref’s blew their whistles. He clapped. He got passed around to everyone. He would not smile for Genny and Michelle. Genny tried really hard but he just wasn’t going to give in. I like going to Kaleb’s games. Michelle had mentioned to me when he started but it just slipped my mind. I think next year I will try and go more if we can. He’ll be in HS next year (HOLY COW) and the games will cost, but be a ton of FUN! It was pouring when we left. It started hailing on our way home too. It was crazy.
We got home around 1ish and after I put Gabe down for his afternoon nap I went to Safeway to pick up a few things I needed for dinner. Terry, Mel and their boy’s were coming over. Kind of funny we had a “Steele” day. It was fun!
For dinner I made Foil-pack Taco Chicken

4 boneless skinless chicken breast halves
4 tsp. taco seasoning mix
1/2 lb. red potatoes, peeled, thinly sliced (about 2 cups)
1/2 cup Thick 'N Chunky salsa
3/4 cup shredded four cheese mexican style cheese
1/4 cup sour cream

Preheat oven to 400 degrees sprinkle chicken with seasoning mix. Place 1/2 cup of potatoes on center of each of 4 large sheets of heavy-duty foil; top evenly with chicken, salsa and cheese.

Bring up foil sides. Double fold top and both ends to seal each packet, leaving room for heat circulation inside. Place in 15x10x1-inch baking pan.

Bake 30-40 minutes or until chicken is cooked through. Remove packets from oven. Let stand 5 min. cut slits in foil to release steam before opening. Serve with sour cream.

And for dessert I made Chocolate Peanut Butter bars (I hadn’t made these in a while. They are very fattening but to die for. I make A LOT of Chocolate Peanut Butter desserts. I think because I know Bryan will love it.)

They showed up around 5:30 and we talked while the boy’s played. Gabe was trying to show them all of his fun toys. Dinner was ready soon after they arrived and we ate. The dinner was a hit. Sammy ate his entire plate plus some of Josh’s. When the boy’s finished they got down and played and we talked more and ate dessert. They left around 8-8:30 when Josh wanted to crawl into Gabe’s crib and sleep. He said “Sleep” and Mel knew that it was time for night-night. It was really fun getting to spend time with them.
After they left I gave Gabe a bath and got him ready for bed. Bryan played some video games and I puttered around on the computer till midnight. Too late probably…I need all the rest I can get. I still don’t feel “normal” yet from this stupid sickness. BLAH!

Sunday we went to church. Bryan had someone cover for him in JR high and we both went to our class. A while back our group did blessings for everyone. We picked one or two couples over a few Sunday’s and we blessed them plus if there was anyway to help them out with anything that happened. Example: they had a work day for Travis and Moo. Well Bryan and I hadn’t been blessed yet…mostly because Bryan teaches JR the same hour our class meets so I’m there alone. Moo arranged with Bryan a Sunday that he could come to class and we got blessed. It’s very different being the one getting blessed. So many people said so many kind things…it was very overwhelming and I started tearing up when Teresa talked and when Moo talked. We definitely felt much loved. We stood around and talked for a while and then we went up to church. There was a couple from Multnomah there for the first time that are considering helping out in JR High so we sat with them.
After service was over I went and got Gabe from the nursery introduced myself to the new couple (I forgot their names oops) and Kambrie came running up to me and showed me the craft she did in her class. Gabe tried to crawl outside…one of the side doors was opened so I closed it and we all ended up over by some stairs up to the balcony. Kambrie was climbing the stairs and sitting on them. Gabe was watching her and just very into her. He wanted to touch her and do what she was doing. It was cute, but at one point he fell down two steps. We’ve been working on showing him how to scoot down the stairs on his tummy but he wants to turn around and show the world that he’s on the stair. I felt HORABLE! He screamed and screamed. I hate that hurt cry that he does too. I hugged him for a bit and calmed him down and pretty soon he wanted back down and crawled back over to the stairs.
After church we went home and ate lunch. Gabe went down around 2 for a nap and both Bryan and I took about an hour nap too. It felt SO good. Bryan worked on homework the rest of the day and when Gabe got up I took him and Calie for a walk around our neighborhood.

OH I forgot PRAISE -- Sunday we got our tax paperwork and signed it for Kelly and we’re getting A LOT back. I am shocked at how much we’re getting. We’re trying to decide if we should use it for a new roof or if we should put it away and build up our savings again. We need a new roof so I don’t know?

Update

Sick and Tired!!!

I am sick and tired of being sick. I am sick once again. I think that I have been sick 4-5 times since Gabe was born. Just a few day's ago I could tell something was off and I was getting that sick feeling. A gal from my work came in on Thursday and said she could barley talk her throat hurt so bad. My throat had been hurting for a day or two, but when I got home Thursday my throat was getting worse and by the time Bryan got home from class I couldn't talk. My mom and sisters are sick too. Gabe sounds a little sicky but doesn't seem to be that bad? Mom went to see the doctor because she seems to have it REALLY bad and they don't want her around anyone for a while. I worked from home on Friday and now I might have to Monday too. Works pretty flexible but it stresses me out. I wish I had a back up sitter.

Luckily Bryan has managed to stay away from being sick. Which is a good thing with everything he has on his plate. Speaking of that, Bryan sent me an email the other day all excited that he got into the last three classes his needs to graduate. If we calculated right his graduation will be on June 13th. Just a little over 4 months away. I am SO excited I can hardly stand it. I can actually see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Two beach weekends in a row

I took the Friday and Monday off of work Feb 8th and 11th. We had our annual women’s retreat at Cannon beach and I went with Teresa. This was the first time I have left Gabe overnight and I wasn’t nervous about leaving him home with Bryan since he watches him Wed’s and Thurs’s every week, just nervous about bed time since I am the one who puts him down every night and just being away over night.

Bryan went to class that morning to take his mid-term and I finished getting things packed up and hung out with Gabe. He was so fun and wanting to sit in my lap and play. We read a few books, watched his baby Mozart movie, and played with his stacking cups. He's now stocking them on his own. I love watching him do it. We all clap afterwards and then he claps. Gabe likes to do things his way. He doesn't clap"normal" (two palms) he pats the top of his hand.

Rabbit trail…bath time has been a struggle lately. I WAS bathing him in the kitchen sink just because it was easier on my back, but the splashing was getting OOC. The kitchen, Calie and I were soaked after bath time. I started putting him in the tub and oh my gosh this kid is ALL over the place. He’s crawling from one side to the other, trying to stand, falling on his bum then splashing then crawling again and when I tell him to sit down he just looks at me with this HUGE smile on his face. Grandma bought him this tub within a tub kind of thing and so now he’s not trying to crawl everywhere, but he is still standing up and trying to climb out of it. So bath time is NOT fun for mommy. It’s a struggle and I’m constantly sitting him back down and saying “No, Gabe you have to sit down” in which he again looks at me with a huge smile and stands up again. AHHHHHH Any suggestions from you moms out there are TOTALLY welcome!!!!!

Anyway, Bryan got home just in time to take me to Teresa’s by 11:30. We wanted to leave by 12. We had an easy drive there. Chatted the whole way…traffic was light and the roads were clear. We got there kind of early…check in time was at 3:30. We roomed with Betty, her friend Melanie and Katie. We went to dinner at Bill’s like we always do before the first session. Jody was our speaker. She and her husband teach our class at church. I think this year was probably one of the best for me. I totally missed Gabe the whole time…thankfully Moo and Lora had their little ones with them so I could get some baby love. Teresa and I didn’t go on the beach this time. We both hadn’t really brought “beach shoes” and the weather was just icky most of the time. We did walk around and look in some of the shops with Moo and Ronna (her MIL). I slept great the first night. Took two Tylenol PM’s which totally knocked me out, took a short nap Saturday and then slept OK Saturday night. I had an amazing time and am glad I went.
T drove me home and boy was I excited to see my little Gabey! Bryan took in my stuff and I said goodbye to T.
Bryan was cleaning up the house when I got home and Gabe was napping. :o( That was ok though apparently the nap was much needed. Bryan and I sat on the couch and talked about our weekends. Gabe and daddy had a fun weekend too. Bryan had a ton of homework so they stayed home and he worked on that Friday night as Gabe permitted. Saturday Bryan had a haircut with Marcella. It’s so cute because Bryan takes Gabe with him to almost all of his haircuts since they are on the day’s he watches him. Gabe sits quietly on his lap and watches Marcella cut Bryan’s hair AND all the women in the place crowd around him and give him a ton of attention. Hehe I told Bryan that next time they keep saying “he’s SO cute!” Bryan should say “Well, thanks but I’m married.” Hehe

They went home after that and got ready for their guests. Dan was bringing “the boy’s” over (Kaleb and Garren) and Randy T came over too. The boy’s spent the night and helped Bryan out with Gabe. Bryan said that both the boy’s did really well with him. They both fed him, but I don’t think they changed a diaper. They had a ton of fun and I think they wore Gabe out. I can’t believe that “my boy’s” who I watched since they were born are watching my kid now. I feel SO old! I have a picture of Kaleb and I in our basement…I’m guessing he’s about 3 in the picture and now he’s taller than me. SO weird! Time sure does fly. It is pretty neat to see them with Gabe. After Dan and Randy left Bryan asked Kaleb and Garren what time they should get up in the morning and they said 6:30am. Bryan and I both have a hard time getting up on Sunday's so I thought that was pretty funny. Bryan got them a Starbucks on the way to church and checked Gabe into the nursery. I didn't have anything to worry about Bryan did great and had great help too! ;o)
When Gabe woke up from his nap I walked in to get him out of his bed and he gave me the biggest smile ever while bouncing up and down. I love how he stands up in his crib now waiting with anticipation for you to walk into the room.

Last weekend we went to the beach with my family for my 30th birthday. Everyone got to go and we found a nice house at the last minute. Mom, Gabe, Julie, Jaden and Nathan left early on Friday and then Bryan, Janell, my dad and I left after work. I was dying to see Gabe by the time we got there. He was still up and so I got to spend a little time with him and put him down to bed too. The layout of the house was nice but things were weird. The gas oven didn't work but the stove worked, the house was slightly slanted, the faucet under the kitchen sink broke and water went everywhere, you had to leave the doors open in order for the rooms to stay warm and that wasn't possible because the house was small enough that we had to close the doors so that the boy's wouldn't wake up. It was so much fun despite that and it wouldn't have been a traditional family vacation without some kind of adventure. Nathan did all the cooking. He is a good cook and a great barbecuer. The weather was absolutely beautiful. We walked to the beach on Saturday and later in the evening the guy's left because Nathan had to work and both Bryan and dad had to be at church. So we had a girls + two baby's night.

Thank you family for making wonderful memory for my birthday